Is hospitality a dying trait?

When you come into my home, you come in as a friend. I will offer you food, drink, and a comfortable place to sit. I will tell you to make yourself at home, and that anything which is mine, is now also yours. There is also enough food in my  home to feed anyone that stops by for a visit, and I never feel ‘put out’ if you drop by in the middle of a meal…I’ll just make you a plate.

This is the way I was raised, and I stand by it. My daughter is already learning how to be hospitable, because I was taught that it was one of the most important things you could do for someone. You want someone to leave your house feeling happy, content, full, and like they want to come back again. Yet you wouldn’t believe how many places I have visited that I don’t feel like that. I’ve gone places and sat for an hour without ever being offered something to drink. I’ve actually had people tell me they don’t like people just stopping in. But why? What is so important that you can’t take an hour out of your day to visit? Is hospitality a dying trait? I sure hope not, but it seems that way sometimes.

So why don’t you tell me if you invite people into your home as though they were welcomed? Do you care if people stop by unexpected? I’m curious to know whether this is just a southern thing, a ‘my family’ thing, or if this is the more dominant way to be and I’ve simply come across some odd ducks.


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Dixie's Ranter
    May 04, 2013 @ 22:03:22

    I agree with both of you on the fact that it is very much so a mutual sort of thing. I’m probably one of the most hospitable people there are and I can’t STAND guests who either take advantage of me, my home, and my family, or who don’t ask before taking the last of something. Also, Audra, I can understand wanting to know before someone comes over. I don’t really mind all that much, but there are certain times of the day or year when anyone who would have a reason knows I am VERY busy, and I tend to prefer people call first during those times.


  2. adtrosper
    Apr 29, 2013 @ 16:17:20

    I’m actually not a fan of company or of people just dropping in. My home is my private space, my sanctuary from the world and I dislike it being invaded by random visitors. I don’t mind so much if whoever is coming lets me know they plan to be here in a few days. I always offer guests food and drink and comfy place to sit. However, I figure part of the guest/host courtesy is not only for the hose to offer these things, but for the guest to call ahead and make sure that the host even wants company.


  3. Charles Yallowitz
    Apr 29, 2013 @ 14:24:29

    I’ve noticed that a lot more people are paranoid and sheltered when it comes to dealing with others. I think it depends on how a person is raised and their previous interactions. My wife is very cautious about letting guests treat our home like their own because several of her past friends have abused that gift. For example, finishing off food without asking or leaving dishes around the house. So, she’s not as quick to roll out the red carpet. I’m not as bad, but I do ask friends to ask before they take something. I’ve lost a few boxes of cookies to overly ambitious, and greedy, guests.


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